Home alone

I was (I still am) home alone since forever now, probably 2 weeks , lost the record. All this while, I've screwed up things, made my home a dustbin, made decisions , failed awefully , felt 'sincere', pretended responsible , acted matured , felt week-grew stronger and yes I did feel void. I always thought I was emotionally cold, and such things may never bother me, but then it does :| As i write this talking to nobody, saturated with television, staring at walls and sick of internet , I wish they were here :|