To Fourier, With Love

Multiplying both sides by , and then integrating from  to  yields:

Of late there’s a lot of turbulence in and around me, yet another time they’re mocking us for being bad engineers and taking yet another round of tests and exams and vivas and likes to tell us what we already know. Nonetheless there’s one thing that I’ve always wanted to say, and as I type this, ‘always’ sounds so small. I’ve wanted to say this ever since we came into existence, and by we, I mean our race. So now without much ado I’d say it. Loud and fucking clear.

Dear Jean Baptiste Joseph Fourier,

Sir,

People spend their lives looking for an inspiration that’ll change their lives forever. What, sire, inspired you to fuck so many generations to come? Or if I may, the mankind. I’ve spent more than four years of my lifetime dreading your name, your equations are my nightmares, your discoveries, my miseries. Is that what you aimed for? Happy now? With all due respect, why? Do you realise you make me an engineer as Chunky Pandey is to acting? No? For the record, I happen to be a technology graduate and I know you’ve spread your poison everywhere, and the world can no more live without your stupid alien-like maddening equations, theorems and series and whatever. That was the plan, right? Well, well played sir. You so knew that we’ll live in an era where people like Ekta Kapoor will rule the world and Pratibha Devi Singh Patil will get to preside over a totally messed up nation, you knew we’ll break all the records of stupidity and strive hard to attain new levels every day, you so knew we’ll do anything to post our images pictures on the facebook only to like it ourselves and become a certified loser. You knew a time would come when people will approach Nirmal Baba for career advice and be fooled by faith. Didn’t you ? I’ve heard French women are hot, did you try your luck? Atleast she’d have ruined your focus, concentration, peace of mind and all that shit that you need for a breakthrough. Sigh. All these four years, I’ve cursed myself for becoming a bad engineer, wasting our nation’s resources and consequently, failing to contribute in any field, whatsoever. Thanks to you. Even after 182 years of your death you’ve managed to screw our vivas, labs, tests, exams, assignments, lectures in so many institutes across so many countries, it feels awesome. Right? I wish I were you. Anyway, I’d never turn back to those pages, to those grim details which makes one question their identity. I love you not, sire. Not that you care.

Sincerely,

A no-one

P.S. Those who have no clue, who he was, this dude, discovered the green-house effect and not that you care but his name is one of the 72 names inscribed on the Eiffel Tower.