I Love You

Dear you,

The day you left is imprinted in my memory like an old childhood nightmare. It’s been a very long time. I don’t remember you. Only when the breeze, kiss the fragrant flowers your scent comes to me. Only when I walk alone, my fingers miss yours. When a tear trickles down my cheek, I feel your touch. Only while sleeping, I dream of you. I wake up to void, my hands search for you on the bed everyday only to realise that you’re not there. My eyes reach the blue skies trying to remember your face, looking at the shapeless clouds. I cook your favourite pasta and serve you a plate every day, hoping its aroma will take you to me. But you never come. As you walked away from me that day, a little something in me died, forever. All that’s left to me, is a pain, a very persistent pain. The doctor said, he could not cure me. Nothing can, but you. Come and kiss my pains away. The woman in me is dying for the man she loves and only a dead cold human corpse is all that is left to me. When the sunshine kiss my lips, I miss yours. I yearn to be in your arms and spend my life with you at a place where the heart does not cry, where the smile isn’t fake, where you and I are together. I could not stop you that day, for you had promises to keep, you had wars to win, to had a nation to serve, you had a duty to fulfill. Our love, dear you, is beyond the material bounds, its beyond the boundaries and territories created by us. We are mere mortals, but our love will go on forever. As I stand here alone, my eyes still search for you on the path where no one treads. Love, is an understatement, what I have for you is much beyond that. My soul is incomplete without yours. I cannot remember you, only when breathing becomes an obligation, your memory falls as a tear.  I know you’ll be back someday because this can’t be the end. I hope this letter finds you in good health. I know, like all my letters, this too will remain unanswered. They say, you’re dead. I know you aren’t. You’re fighting like a lion for our nation and I know you’ll be back for us, for our love.  

Love,

Me

To Fourier, With Love

Multiplying both sides by , and then integrating from  to  yields:

Of late there’s a lot of turbulence in and around me, yet another time they’re mocking us for being bad engineers and taking yet another round of tests and exams and vivas and likes to tell us what we already know. Nonetheless there’s one thing that I’ve always wanted to say, and as I type this, ‘always’ sounds so small. I’ve wanted to say this ever since we came into existence, and by we, I mean our race. So now without much ado I’d say it. Loud and fucking clear.

Dear Jean Baptiste Joseph Fourier,

Sir,

People spend their lives looking for an inspiration that’ll change their lives forever. What, sire, inspired you to fuck so many generations to come? Or if I may, the mankind. I’ve spent more than four years of my lifetime dreading your name, your equations are my nightmares, your discoveries, my miseries. Is that what you aimed for? Happy now? With all due respect, why? Do you realise you make me an engineer as Chunky Pandey is to acting? No? For the record, I happen to be a technology graduate and I know you’ve spread your poison everywhere, and the world can no more live without your stupid alien-like maddening equations, theorems and series and whatever. That was the plan, right? Well, well played sir. You so knew that we’ll live in an era where people like Ekta Kapoor will rule the world and Pratibha Devi Singh Patil will get to preside over a totally messed up nation, you knew we’ll break all the records of stupidity and strive hard to attain new levels every day, you so knew we’ll do anything to post our images pictures on the facebook only to like it ourselves and become a certified loser. You knew a time would come when people will approach Nirmal Baba for career advice and be fooled by faith. Didn’t you ? I’ve heard French women are hot, did you try your luck? Atleast she’d have ruined your focus, concentration, peace of mind and all that shit that you need for a breakthrough. Sigh. All these four years, I’ve cursed myself for becoming a bad engineer, wasting our nation’s resources and consequently, failing to contribute in any field, whatsoever. Thanks to you. Even after 182 years of your death you’ve managed to screw our vivas, labs, tests, exams, assignments, lectures in so many institutes across so many countries, it feels awesome. Right? I wish I were you. Anyway, I’d never turn back to those pages, to those grim details which makes one question their identity. I love you not, sire. Not that you care.

Sincerely,

A no-one

P.S. Those who have no clue, who he was, this dude, discovered the green-house effect and not that you care but his name is one of the 72 names inscribed on the Eiffel Tower. 

An open letter to Lord Rama

Dear Lord Rama,

SadarCharan Sparsh. I don’t know, where, at this instant in space and time, you are and in what avatar, as they say. Honestly, I care about the pink unicorn that some random girl in some random part of Japan is thinking about right now, more. But, what the hell. I write to you expecting, you’d resolve my doubts because you’re the god. Yes, it’s about the ‘Ramayana’. So the entire drama started when a random innocuous woman called Surpanakha who happened to be Sir Ravana’s beloved sister, apparently fell in love with you and was harmlessly flirting with you, how do you explain slaying her nose off, isn’t that, dear god, a misuse of powers ? Because as far as I know, gods are ideal. So Anyway, as an unfortunate consequence, this dude called Ravana abducted your wife to take revenge. C’mon you cannot deny it, Surpanakha was a harmless nymph, isn’t what you did to her was an over-reaction? Unfair, is the word. Anyway, I have this huge respect for Sir Ravana for he took great care of your wife and respected her. And after all this drama, when she’s finally released, you make her go through the freaking ‘Agnipariksha’ ? Seriously? What got into you? Weren’t you supposed to be a god? Is this a god-like deed? No. That is not even human, sir. I’ve never seen such a blatant display of hypocrisy wrapped in delusion and irrationality. Your deed, dear god, was lowly and disgusts the hell out of me. You disrespected a woman, objectified her and reasoned it on flimsy grounds. Ask a 5-year old and he’ll tell you how immoral you were. Or as @thesomisetty says here maybe you were meant to be a villain and we’ve been mis-interpreting the entire plot altogether for centuries now. In the end, Ravana emerges as a true hero but sadly, dies a cruel death. You know what bothers me? That although you are a character of figment , you are defined as a god. Everything you do, is by definition, correct. Your heinous act of discrimination, sexism and upright disrespect for Sita, is considered right, in the eyes of your believers. And let’s face it, both of us know, how these believers ape things and never feel the need of questioning things. I now know why we live in a society where women, still have to fight for their rights and fall prey to shit-heads to no justice and respect, even after thousands of years of civilisation we haven’t grown any bit. You’ve set a bad example for the society and honestly, you’re not even remotely, god-like. I respect Rakhi Sawant, more. Also,no offense.

Sincerely,

An Atheist/Agnostic

Dear Readers, you may begin to shower me with hate mails for my blasphemy. But remember, it is a victimless crime.

P.S. It is an epic and nothing till date is written as brilliantly as The Ramayana and the Mahabharat. I’m a huge fan of Valmiki.

P.P.S It, obviously is a fiction but people think otherwise thus, the Kolaveri Di :P
P.P.P.S If you're wondering, No, Rama didn't slay Surpanakha's nose.Lakshman did. Rama didn't oppose. Lakshman wasn't punished for his act either. 

An Acknowledgement Letter

I write this acknowledgement letter to all those humble and very concerned souls who’ve invested their lives to point out to me that I’m lean which, I wouldn’t have noticed otherwise. Also, to those who without fail, without asking for it, keep suggesting, advising, or randomly keep blabbering about something that is very personal to my life. Here’s an acknowledgment letter to you all,

Dear the-above-mentioned-category,

How do I thank you for what you’ve done for me for all these immensely critical and important years of my life. Who else would have pointed out at every social gathering, at every minute, every second of my life, that I weigh lesser than an ant. If not you, I would’ve died without even noticing it. No words can express my gratitude towards you, noble souls. But there’s one thing, that has always made me curious, why don’t you mind your own fucking business? Have you ever thought about that? No? Then, kindly do. That’ll be a whole lot of unexplored horizon for you. I can no more smile into nothingness and live that awkward three minute phase, I can’t stop myself from telling you to stfu, anymore. Invest your time, losing that unwanted ugly unhealthy fat from your body. Have you ever seen yourself in the mirror? Please do. Your unintelligible attempts at hiding that flab with your supposedly strategic orange piece of shimmery draping is not even funny anymore. I had to stoop down to your level to shut you up. Also, one more time you ask me, ‘kuch khati nahi kya?’ I’ll make you watch Star Parivaar Awards in a loop, but considering your IQ, that’s a good deal for you. Well, how about this, you lesser mind, I’ll make you watch The Big Bang Theory for 48 hours straight without even telling you what Ohm’s law is. Also, do not ever grab my wrist to measure how thin I am, I’m sure your eyes are well equipped to comprehend three dimensional objects, you needn’t touch to prove your multi-dimensional stupidity. When you mock me for not being able to apply the eye liner, or a nail paint, whose existence is of no importance to this universe or to any parallel universe whatsoever, you look like the drunk director of Malamaal Weekly, who decided to make a sequel of the movie, unaware of the logistics and insulting the Indian masses by questioning their sense of humor, under-estimating their ability to comprehend things and taking undue advantage of the amount of shit, that us Indians can take. O well, pardon me, for I got swayed. Do you not understand the do-your-job-and-get-the-hell-out-of-there funda? Why do you have to embarrass yourself everytime we meet? I can’t even pretend that I care anymore. I understand, it’s difficult to get a life. I know your love life sucks and last time you dated a man/woman was 1000 years back, I also know that your spouse is mentally paralysed to take any shit from you and respond accordingly and that, your kids are too busy flaunting the pink iphone, planning the date, choosing the skirt and are on their peak of  I-know-it-all-kindly-stay-away phase. I know it’s difficult for you to shut up, try meditating. No? Please spare me for I may not be able to follow the social protocol anymore. Stop telling me what to do and what not, I am no Sonam A Kapoor, I don’t take bad decisions on a daily basis with that kind of confidence over-confidence.Thank you for everything. Kindly concentrate on your lives, your partners, sisters, mothers, daughters, need attention. You’re welcome.

Thanking You,

X

55 Word Story

The Cafe

She still visited his favourite coffee shop, praying the lord that this time, he’s late. But unlike those times, he wouldn’t. She waited there for hours, for the miracle to happen, but like always, it didn’t. She left with a pain in her heart and tear in her eye as the attendants bid her goodbye.

Water

They were stuck in the infinities of water, rushing waves, mountains of molecules with tremendous energy ready to consume them. Tortured by energy, they felt very small. They could feel the turbulence in their hearts. They kissed each other, as if to bid goodbyes, closed their eyes, as the sea roared and ate them both.

Gods and Demons

He was a demon who resided in her as her god. He killed her from within and yet for her, their love was chaste. He sucked every tinch of life out of her and yet she refused to acknowledge life sans him. As she sang her soul to sleep, the demon consumed her physical self.

Bed

Their love knew no bounds, they’d always be together melting in each others’ arms on that little bed that witnessed their love from the depth of the seas to the zenith’s height, it also witnessed their separation, saw her die within, saw her bleed. She died in its lap and soon it became her sarcophagus.

Dear You,

Dear You,

Where in the folds of life did I lose you? I still carry, somewhere in the depths of my soul, the shattered pieces of my heart that still hurt and keep our love alive and eternal. Life is no longer mine, since I’ve lost you. Remember those phone calls, those texts at each hour, thinking about each other every minute, every second of our lives? Remember those long walks to nowhere holding each others’ hands to walk together forever? I miss that warmth, I miss that walk, I miss talking to you, I miss looking into your eyes and forgetting the world, I miss you. I miss my life. Ever since you’ve gone, there’s a stagnance, Life has come to a still, where no road takes to you, where no face resemble yours, where the red flowers in the bouquet aren’t for me, where there are no surprises awaiting, where the day ends as it began. My life is an obligation, I live for  compulsion. You remember how we promised each other to live together forever and dreaded the idea that eventually the inevitable death would part us? Life has separated us now and I still fail to figure out, how on this earth, with this life, sans you, would I survive. Our worst nightmare has come true, with a difference that like always, you’re not there to comfort me and tell me that we’ll go on forever and that, even the death won’t part us. I still visit your favourite coffee shop and sit on your favourite chair praying to the lord that this time, you’re late. But unlike those times, you aren’t. I wait there for hours, waiting for the miracle to happen, but like always, it doesn’t. I leave with a pain in my heart and tear in my eye as the attendants bid me goodbye. I see the frosted flowers in my notebook that you once presented me and some part of me dies within.  I miss your fragrance, your touch on my cheek, I miss thinking of new and romantic ways of expressing my love for you every day and still even the stupidest of them made you smile. I miss that tear of joy when we looked at each other and said nothing at all. That moment was divine, it defined the chastity of our eternal love. In that moment I lived a thousand lives and more. I love you from the depths of my heart to the zenith’s height and more for if I state it in words, I’d be unjust. I search for you in the crowd of million and still come out to be the lonliest girl in the masses. I still watch any random movie in a theatre only to find the seat next to me, vacant and walk off with that emptiness. That void will stay with me till my sarcophagus for no one else can touch my soul like you did. I will carry our memories of the sacred moments that we spent together and cherish them for my lifetime. Those moments of our togetherness transcends space and time and shall be cherished for many lives to come. I will love you more each passing day, for that’s the only thing I put my heart and soul into. I ask for no more and no less. If not us, our love will go on forever.

Love,

Me

P.S. A Fictitious Love Letter

An open letter to Behenji

Behen Mayawatiji,

To say the least, I’m a huge fan of yours. The way you carry your classy ensemble is beyond any words and your chic haircut just adds cherry on the cake. How do you manage all this amidst all the Ambedkar park tamasha ? I’m sure it takes hours for you to choose a completely ill-fitted, bad-coloured salwaar-kameez , because, well, it’s rare. No one sells something that bad. Oh wait, Delhi does. But well, that’s your personal choice. You stand by it without fail, I respect you for that. But guess what else is personal ? Your Rs. 685 crores expensive personal dream in a country where 30% of the population lie below the poverty line. You know what else is personal ? The park’s dozen statues, which include yours and your parents’.I mean, hello? What were you thinking? You are the fucking chief minister of a totally screwed up state, you chose to be the leader? Be the leader. Are you not tired of your irrationalities already? I mean, c’mon. I say this as a fellow citizen who does not want to hate you but do I have an option? If at all you have any clue, what I am talking about. First thing tomorrow, go and put some sense into those men who are no less than hooligans on the road and call themselves, the policemen. I refuse to accept their behaviour.  Teach them some manners? No ? Teach them the concept of mutual respect. No, they didn’t catch me for pda in the Ambedkar park. Seriously K  Ambedkar park man, you ordered to cut down 6000 trees to build this park? Even Poonam Pandey becoming a nun, wouldn’t be *that* ironical. You know her? Wonder woman, she is. Anyway, since I’m just a huge fan of yours, I dropped in to tell you about the traffic fuck ups in Noida. Since, you don’t bother taking the road way and land on a especially made helipad in some random school in Noida, you obviously wouldn’t know. So the other day, when, you happened to inaugurate your dream project, per say, hours before your celeb-like-arrival, your corrupt officers were trying to cover their screw ups on the last minute by blocking the roads and disrupting the traffic for hours. How do you explain that?  Who are we ? And what’s up with the Helicopter? Who are you ? Have you ever ever travelled on the Noida roads? Or are you always too busy with the embellishments? I don’t get it. You sanctioned  a sum of Rs. 18 crores to combat encephalitis, after more than 400 children died in eastern UP and bloody 685 crores for that shit? Are you insanely out of your wits? I don’t think so. You obviously are an awesome woman, you know. An inspiration for many well.. whatever  so, I’d want to enlighten you, since you are ‘The Mayawati’. I don’t do it for others .Here are the tips,

·         Don’t let people call you, ‘Behen(ji)’ It closes a whole new horizon of dating men and stuff, you know?

·         Next time you go shopping, take me along?  Deal?

·         It’s freaking 50 deg outside .Get off those full sleeves :o You want sensors?

·         When you have no clue, where to spend all that extra black money, or the hard earned money by the taxpayers, again, contact me. I wanted a Lee shirt K

·         Before dreaming something big like the disaster you just made, consult a psychiatrist. I ain’t kidding.

·         Fire all your policemen. Or I’ll kill them on the road.

·         Do something about the jams, roads, rules, heard these words? No? I don’t blame you. Schools in Uttar Pradesh K

·         Have you ever travelled to Aligarh, benaras, Allahabad.. etcetera? You probably haven’t, these places have no free space for a helipad .Sad. Men there, need some psychiatric attention. Or just more copies of Playboy. Whatever. Next time, a shit happens to me, I turn into Damini of the movie, Damini. Makes sense? Good.

·         Have you ever thought about developing the rest of Uttar Pradesh ? Or are you too busy presenting the winning trophy to Vettel ?  Isn’t he hot ? I know.

·         And well. C’mon marry now. J

Yours Loving,

A common man(woman) whatever