Stupid me !

I know not, how do things happening to stupid people, keep happening to me.I was home alone for almost a week now and have screwed up any and every task I was assigned.In the last one week, I've cooked horrible food, broke utensils, spent infinite money on things like, say, onion. My life has pretty much turned into that of morons'.To add cherry on the cake, everyday when I came back home, something or the other was missing; Glasses, pillow etcetera. I don't know how, I could never trace.I've also been bullshitting every assignment in college and almost narrowly escaped death the other day on road.Sometime back, I banged the car door right on a man's face and I'm pretty sure If I were a guy, I'd have beaten then and there. I so love to be a female :| I've lost my i-pod and I can't find my watch, some book and things. My place has started looking like a giant garbage bin with rotten food and dirt-clad every inorganic thing. When at home, I've started inhaling dirt, I'd probably have to cover my mouth like  SARS patient. Fish! I'm in deep shit. Someone pull me out !