Dear Freshers,

Now, that you freshers have joined college, you need to know the fundamental differences.

1. Don’t think about ragging, no one cares to rag you, lot of effort, no fun.

2.If you have ever watched Ekta Kapoor’s daily soaps showing colleges and likes, no, no one sings here in red duppatta and silver heels in the mid of nowhere. You’d be stoned to death.

3. The excuses you gave in schools about traffic and stuff, turn real here but the teachers don’t buy it. Yes, it’s like a god-like thing punishing you for your deeds. Uh Anyway,

4. Generally, there’s no mutual respect between the student body and teaching staff. Except that the students feign respect for faculties, faculties don’t even bother doin’ that.

5. Forget Robert Frost, don’t go the unconventional way, follow the masses. Either way, your life is screwed.

6. You can never make it to 9:15 lecture even if you start at night. Stop trying.

7. Unlike in school where in a protective environment, teachers keep kicking your asses to get the work done. Here, no one cares, you don’t do it, you’re done.

8. Teachers come and go, only yours and theirs, incompetence remains constant.

9. Don’t ever get de-barred in Behavioural Sciences. Don't let the lady, some 2 years older to you, flaunting bad grammar and f***ed-up pronunciation, tell you what life is about. Figure it out yourself. Trust me she’s equally screwed or prolly more.

10. Learn to be a hypocrite. Yeah.

11. Pretend you’re passionate about Sciences and technology and how it changes lives and makes things simpler and stuff even if you don’t give a shit.

12. Don’t tell people you’re an engineering under-graduate, they’d tell you to repair their light-bulbs, only to add to your frustration.

13. Tell people your engineering drawing sheet holder is a missile launcher and if touched, may explode. 78% buy that, true story.

14. There would be infinitely many incidents in your life when you would want to reply a long long speech/lecture/personal philosophy of a lecturer with ‘whatever’ or ‘shut up’ or ‘dude, get a life’ ,but dear kids, hold on there. Take, how-to-be-a-fake-listener classes from miss So**m Su*****i, instead.

15. Think stupid, act foolish, play cool. That’s the key.

16. Vivas.. well I’d rather write another post for that.

That said, college is fun. All the best ! Remember, life after death, sucks.